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Building Connection While Leading a Group Activity for People with Dementia

Leading a group activity in a care facility isn't about perfect execution—it's about creating moments of shared joy and connection. When you focus on the process rather than the outcome, you invite everyone to participate at their own level, reducing anxiety and sparking engagement. This guide gives you concrete steps, real phrases to say, and practical tools to turn any activity into a warm, community-building experience. You don't need to be a trained therapist; you just need to show up with empathy and a few simple strategies.

Key points

  • Focus on the process of doing something together, not on completing a perfect product. Connection is the real goal.
  • Use side-by-side positioning and simple demonstrations rather than long verbal instructions. Show, don't just tell.
  • Offer choices (two at a time) to give a sense of control and reduce anxiety.
  • Praise effort, not accuracy. Avoid correcting mistakes. Redirect gently.
  • Keep activities short (15–20 minutes) and flexible. End early on a positive note if needed.
  • Tailor the activity to the person's current stage and type of dementia. What works for one person may not work for another.

Why Connection Matters More Than the Activity Itself

When a person has dementia, their ability to process complex instructions or remember the steps of a game may fade, but their need for social connection remains strong. In fact, engaging with others is a form of brain exercise—it helps build new neural pathways and keeps the mind active. As one expert explains, doing something different and unique with someone is a social exercise that fires synapses and supports overall well-being (source 2). This means that even a simple activity, like polishing a table or sorting large puzzle pieces, becomes a powerful tool for connection when you focus on the shared experience rather than the finished product.

In a care facility, many staff members—aides, housekeeping, dietary, and activities directors—have the most contact with residents, yet they may not all have extensive dementia training (source 1). This makes it even more important for you, as the activity leader, to use techniques that prioritize emotional safety and inclusion. When residents feel seen and valued, they are more likely to participate, and their dementia symptoms may even progress more slowly because they are staying mentally and socially active (source 7). The goal is not to entertain but to create a sense of belonging and purpose.

The Power of Side-by-Side Engagement

One of the most effective ways to build connection is to stand or sit beside the person, facing the same direction, and focus on a shared task. This removes the pressure of direct eye contact and conversation, which can be overwhelming when words are changing or hard to find (source 3). For example, if you are leading a group craft, you might set up materials at a table and work alongside residents, narrating what you are doing in a calm, encouraging voice. The point is not that everyone completes the craft successfully—it is that you are all doing something together.

This approach also works well when family members or other residents join in. Inviting another person to participate takes the focus off of just you and the resident, fostering new relationships and reducing any awkwardness (source 10). When the activity is process-oriented, everyone can contribute at their own level. A person who cannot hold a paintbrush might still enjoy watching colors blend or feeling the texture of clay. By celebrating the process, you create a safe space where no one feels they have failed.

General caregiving information, not medical advice. Check medications and major care changes with your clinician.

Step-by-step

  1. Position yourself beside the person, facing the same direction toward a shared task to reduce direct eye contact pressure.

  2. Invite participation at any level (e.g., 'Let’s see what this feels like'), focusing on the process, not the outcome.

  3. Use simple, present-tense cues and physical guidance (e.g., 'Hold this with me') instead of complex instructions.

  4. Pause after each step to observe and respond to the person’s cues—adjust pace or action based on their engagement.

What not to do

  • Do not correct mistakes or insist on the 'right' way to do the activity.

  • Do not ask test-like questions (e.g., 'Do you remember what this is?')

  • Do not use direct eye contact or expect verbal conversation as the primary connection method.

Practical tools

  • Shared simple task

    A tactile, low-instruction item (e.g., folding cloths, sorting large beads, watering a plant) that allows side-by-side engagement without complex steps.

  • Open-ended, process-focused phrases

    Prepared phrases like 'Let’s try this together,' 'Feel this,' or 'What do you notice?' to invite participation without demanding correct responses.

  • Gentle physical cues

    Light hand-over-hand guidance or a tap on the arm to model an action or redirect attention, always after pausing for the person’s readiness.

Discuss with your clinician

If a resident becomes consistently agitated or aggressive during group activities, discuss with the facility's nurse or doctor whether there might be an underlying medical issue (pain, infection, medication side effect) that needs addressing.

If you want to use aromatherapy (e.g., lavender essential oil) as part of a sensory activity, check with the clinical team first, as some residents may have allergies or sensitivities, and some oils can interact with medications.

If a resident has a history of swallowing difficulties (dysphagia), avoid any activity that involves small objects that could be a choking hazard. Discuss safe alternatives with the speech therapist or nurse.

Related guides

Sources